ph33r my l33t oldbie-skillz...these are the ones that were on RA2MM ages ago...
Fun Stuff-FROM WW FORUMS-You are a CNC//RA2 ADDICT WHEN.... - Posted Thursday 29 Mar, 2001
The first thing to begin this section…what do everyday hardcore gamers like us do about C&C…check it out!
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A C&C ADDICT WHEN…
...After buying the ra2 collector’s edition, The only reason You finally break-down and buy a dvd-player is so You can at last view the dvd-disc that came with that collector’s edition.
- You dress up as a Tesla Trooper for Halloween. And the Tesla suit actually works.
- You make some faux Tiberium crystals with ice cream and scatter them around the yard at night.
- You actually bother to try to find explanations on all the scientific inaccuracies of C&C/RA.
- You write Kane-isms.
You say, "vehicle reporting" for no apparent reason
You are absolutely sure Nod exists
You actually KNOW what the ideology behind NOD is.
When.............
You find yourself getting dressed in the morning, and you decide to look in the mirror for fifteen minutes perfecting your "Kirov reporting" or "Why don't you drive".
- When you jump off the old ladies roof next door in a brown suite while screaming in Russian into her bedroom window proclaiming to be a paratrooper.
- When you carry a large white cursor with you.
- When you give rabbits heart attacks and say your Yuri assassinating infantry with mind control.
- When in a meeting you create a blockade of chairs and scream '' we're taking heavy fire!’’
- When your principle calls your parents because you jumped off the steep hill during P.E. reluctantly saying '' I can go anywhere ''.
- When your cat hides from you because it is scared that it has to role-play the fall of the feline one more time.
- You sit down to dinner with your family and you swiftly poor the dinner into a metal box proclaiming it must be harvested for credits immediately and your resources are exhausted.
When whenever you see a laser, you scream "AAAAARGH, PRISM TOWERS!!!"
Whenever you give a paper to another student in school you say (with a good imitation as well)"I lost my bomb, do you have it?"
When your friends ask you where to go & you reply, "I can go anywhere". (Rocketeer)
When you try to avoid all the 'attack' dogs wandering in the neighborhood.
When the sky darkens & you shout "Take cover, the THUNDERSTORM is ACTIVATED!"
When you dress up as a desolator during a fight, claiming that you can take out all the opposition by yourself & shout, "Spread the DOOM!!!" before the fight.
When the first thing you think of when you run out of pocket money is to capture an oil derrick.
Your girlfriend tries to dress like LT.Zofia to distract you from playing for a minute.
Your trio of house cats start saying, "sir! Yes sir"! every few minutes.
When you try to send messages to the computer when playing a skirmish game.
Your ass falls asleep for so long you need help getting up.
You try to re-build a rain forest using mirage tanks.
You scold your mouse for letting you down, and then spank it for punishment.
You keep wishing Tanya would say cha-ching 3 times in a row. It hasn’t happened yet.
Wish you could chronoshift to take a wiz...
The pizza delivery guy has his own screen name on YOUR Westwood online account.
- You make your own Cabal, and attempt to take the world in the name of Kane
2 - when you design your room to look 100% like a nod temple
3 - when you change your name to Alexi Romanov
4 - you build a cronosphere which works
5 - you found out that you failed on your report card, and go the the principal and say "What was that? You call that a tactic? You disgust me"
6 - you mined control the missile command guys and lunch the nukes with the silo doors closed
7 - you stand on the street and say "Peace Through Power! For The Technology Of Peace! Kane Leaves In Death!"
8 - you became the schoolcaptian and your first speech is the one Kane says in TS NOD missions, when he returns. <(I forget what he said, I haven’t played TS for months)>
9 - you steal a Nuclear war-head and a truck, put the war-head in the truck drive to your school yelling out the window "Don't wait up for me"
10 - when you have a bomb, hand it to your principle and say "I lost a bomb, do you have it?"
11 - you say every time you move "Sir Yes Sir"
12 - you keep saying "Tesla Trooper reporting" "2000 Volts coming up"
13 - upon waking up you say "Kirov reporting"
14 - you can say "Shake it baby" the same way Tanya does
15 - you computer sounds are Tanya’s sounds from RA2
10. Every time you walk in a building you insist it should have sandbags around it.
11. You visit the maternity ward at the hospital and every time they bring out a newborn you say "unit ready"
9. You keep wondering why the car doesn't chronoshift home after getting groceries.
8. You boycott the new CELL Tower being built claiming it's a psychic beacon
7. Then proceed to tell them they are already under its influence when they don't believe you
6. Wonder why all the female infantry aren't in a mid-cut tank tops.
5. You refuse to go anywhere near a tree!
4. You’re at a football game and you suddenly scream and dive for cover when the Goodyear blimp flies over the stadium.
3. You make your friends and family refer to you as nothing more than "commander".
2. You tell your boss at work "whatever your paying me, it's not enough!"
-When some one makes mad, you try to mind control them
-you get a tattoo just like Yuri’s on your forehead
-your constantly being arrested for trying to sneak into military, and then tell the mp's that you've been mind controlled and your trying to get Chrono Ivan
-when you forget something important, you just Chrono back and get it
-you shoot your neighbors w/ a BB guns from across the street making sniper quotes w/ a mean British accent
-you build a ore processor in your backyard to help you pay off your bills
-whenever you get a chance, you eat calamari, and say "who’s gotta force-fire at who now?"
-You build a psychic sensor to detect salesman before they arrive
-You try to build a terror drone out of your erector set
-you pave over your entire yard to avoid the dreaded NOD underground-engineer rush
-you call your camper a MCV
-you try to use your direct TV satellite as a an ion cannon uplink
-you wonder why none of the GIs or conscripts ever walk their attack dogs
-you put dynamite on pets and drop them at hated neighbors front doors
-you keep brains in a jar on your desk, and talk to them
-you spend hours trying to figure what the hell is on Yuri’s head?
You ring an electrician for an "emergency" and when he arrives, you run him over screaming, "you tesla guys CAN be run over!"
You walk around with two cardboard stripes tied to your ankle and tell people you're elite.
You think it's perfectly safe to visit Chernobyl because radiation doesn't last that long anyways.
You have waded through the mix files enough to see the leftover RA1 graphics in RA2.
You get in a construction truck if there is a nuclear warning, and hope it's in full green.
You built a terror drone with your Lego Mind storms set.
You actually used it on someone's car.
You watch "Ghostbusters" and wonder why they don't chronoshift.
You are making a RA2 total conversion.
Every time you pass by a dump truck you wonder what happened to the turret.
You watch "The Matrix" and think it would only have taken a Desolator instead of all that kung fu.
You gather up $600 and try to buy a tank from your local army base.
You complain about "Red October" having no squids.
You're surprise you can always recognize James Bond as himself in the movies.
You turn in a RA/RA2 review... and it's for your Modern History class.
You think that the gulf syndrome was caused by desolator radiation.
When every night before you go to sleep you push the giant save game button you put on your wall
1) In history test you said Einstein made Chronosphere
2) You tried to transform the nearby tower to Tesla Coil
3) Name your son as Romanov
When you wake up in the morning, and immediately say: "Battle control online"
1.You get a briefcase, a hardhat and work-pants then go to a military installation and run into buildings shouting "Building captured"
2.On new-years eve when they're shooting fireworks you run around screaming» The Rusk’s are attacking, hide from the V3's!"
You have a hammer and sickle permanently tattooed on your arm.
You stick all your forks in all your house's outlets and call it a tesla reactor.
You bend spoons and fry your food without lifting a finger.
When your boss fires you, you pull out your mortar and say, "at least I have job."
When asked about the man you murdered, you respond to the police in British: "He was never alive."
- You see a building site and wonder why it didn't just appear out of the ground
- you get a job in a nuclear power station, put on a radiation suit and claim that you are a desolator
- you look into a barracks and wonder where the endless line of soldiers come from
- you don't know why you need to eat, sleep, go to the loo etc
- you see an airoplane and try to follow it to see where the NOD base is
- you don't dare go for a cruise for fear of being over-turned by a giant squid
- you're scared that if you go between 2 posts a laser fence might suddenly come on
- you see a small hole and tell everyone that it is the corner of a firestorm wall section
- you're scared hayle's comet will crash and tiberium will start growing from the crater
- you think that the christmas tree will shoot you
10) When you are in a fistfight with someone and try to disconnect before you're really hurt.
9) When you expect that other guy to wait for 100 sec. before hitting you again.
8) When you try to kill people with your flashlight.
7) When you tell your girlfriend you will get to bed too soon and you see her get up again for work.
6) When everybody that wants to get into your house MUST pet the dog first!! (You never know...)
5) When you can't hear the noise from your CD-ROM player that annoyed you
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